191917

Joke of the Day

"If I had a dog I'd say ""I have a bone to pick with you!"" and then we'd go to PetSmart to pick a bone and we'd laugh & laugh & can dogs laugh"

"Why do T Rexes have such bad anger issues? Because their fathers never hugged them."

"What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country."

"How can we know atheism exists? Where's the evidence?"

"What's Franklin D Roosavelt's favorite game show? Deal or New Deal"

"*cop pulls me over* ""Sir do you-"" You a cop? You have to tell me if you're a cop ""What?"" You seem cool. Wanna buy some weed? *pause* ""Yes"""

"I said to the chemist: ""Can I have some sleeping pills for the wife?"" He said: ""Why?"" I said: ""She keeps waking up."""

"New egg is so Corny (Have they always done this) http://oi61.tinypic.com/33kak2a.jpg"

"[at wife's funeral] Son: At least shes in heaven now Me: [delicately places hand on his shoulder] You don't know shit about your mom"

"An Irishman walks into an AA meeting. Just kidding."