191830

Joke of the Day

"how did the bananas get away from the cops? They split up."

"What beverage should you give someone who is publicly intoxicated? penal tea edit: to someone"

"What's the easiest thing to lift with a forklift? A palette."

"What's a sorority girls favorite camera? A Like uh"

"New rule for football: when a player is at the bottom of a pile after being tackled everyone on top has to whisper to him a compliment"

"When does an astronaut eat his favourite meal? At launch time."

"I only like 70 things.. One is alcohol. Another is 69."

"Would a charming vampire be a neck-romancer?"

"I'll be shaking hands with business people in front of a globe today if any stock photographers want to make some easy cash."

"4: Where did I come from? Me: Mommy's belly. 4: How'd I get there? Me: I, uh...put you there? 4: How did you... Me: WHO WANTS ICE CREAM?!"