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Joke of the Day
"Why did the suicidal chicken cross the road? To get to the other side"
Next Joke
"I finally saw Kung Fu Panda. I'm certainly not an expert, but I thought the nunchuck scene looked kind of fake."
"How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. The question is how they got in there."
"Who doesn't want to be a millionaire? Well, certainly not a billionaire."
"I think when shit hits the fan you really should rethink why and where you have that fan."
"Wife: ""you think all that sugar you fed the kids this morning was a wise idea?"" Me: ""why?"" W: M: W: ""they're running along side the car"""
"The Most Hipster Job Of All Time Is... Being a Mortician. Morticians are so hipster that their work doesn't get more popular; instead it just goes further underground."
"Do you know why Morgan Freeman's name is Morgan Freeman? Because his first name is Morgan and his last name is Freeman"
"What can you use to fill your butt crack? Ass-fault"
"I can tell these $80 Nikes are going to help me get from the couch to the bathroom six times a day a lot faster."