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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a baby? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window."

"My buddy just got a supercomputer. Thing's about as big as a room. That shit Cray."

"Gift horse ""My gums are bleeding."" Dentist ""Well this is a professional dilemma..."""

"A kangaroo walks into a bar. He orders a beer. The bartender says, That'll be $10. You know, we don't get many kangaroos coming in here. The kangaroo says, At $10 a beer, it's not hard to understand."

"What did the Mexican Firefighter name his two children? Jose and Hose B"

"My Masseuse just read 'Cinderella' to me ~ That's the last time I ask for a happy ending."

"I hate when Spotify is down and I have to listen to Apple Music on my 128 GB Rose Gold iPhone 6s Plus like some kind of homeless person"

"I was asked how I view lesbian relationships Apparently 'in HD' isn't the correct answer."

"I wonder if anyone in a full burqa ever thinks, ""Wow, that's a great picture of me."""

"Sometimes things are not what they appear. Just because I am sitting with an open book doesn't mean that I am studying."