1914

Joke of the Day

"The Blonde Waitress Customer: Can I have some coffee without cream please? Blonde Waitress: We are fresh out of cream, sir. Can I bring you coffee without milk instead?"

"The bathroom is the best room in the world... People expect shit-all of you there"

"I never thought I'd love my family more than my Xbox 360, and it turned out I was right."

"I don't bring pooper scoopers when I walk my dog I would, but my dog doesn't give a shit"

"How do librarians file melted marshmallows? According to the Gooey Decimal System."

"What do you call a super cool assassin? A badassassin."

"Why wouldn't you hire bears from Australia? Because they don't have the necessary koalafications. (Derived from: http://www.neatorama.com/2014/04/07/When-Animals-Argue/)"

"Why do scuba divers roll backwards out of the boat? Cause if they rolled forwards, they would still be in the boat."

"My girlfriend told me to stop singing wonderwall... I said maybe..."

"What's the difference between a bull and an orchestra? The bull has the horns in front and the asshole in the back."