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Joke of the Day

"Yea? Well who died & made you Batman? Oh crap..that's right. Bruce, I'm so sorry. Come on, dude, don't cry. Seriously, where you going?"

"My hearing-impaired GF left me for a hearing-impaired man. I should have seen the signs."

"*SEXIST* If the man's bathrooms on the left, where is the woman's... Even further left because they HAVE NO RIGHTS!"

"Two peanuts walk into a bar... One was a-salted."

"For most people when you lose your ""khakis"" you've lost your pants. When you're from Boston & lose your ""khakis"" you can't start your car."

"...how is life in North Korea? I can't complain."

"My poetic look on the election Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Damn it, America! What the fuck did you do?!"

"What is a vampire's favorite fruit? a Neck-tarine --From a great co-worker"

"vote for me if ew like it watsup boring.facebook fucking.viber irritating.tango disgusting.skype ignoring. google porn'in ....lyf is complicated."

"What is a java programmers favorite bird? A BlueJ"