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Joke of the Day

"I went to a blind tasting session the other day... It was a waste of time, they tasted the same as people who can see."

"What's a ghost's favorite type of car? A Booghati"

"Neighbor just yelled at me for playing in his sprinkler. Note to self, I should wear clothes next time."

"What do you call a T-Rex with a bomb strapped to it's chest? Dinomite"

"I'm trying to raise a horse but she has insomnia. It's a nightmare."

"Nobody on this train is decent enough to give up their seat for a pregnant woman & now I gotta stand here w/my sweater balled up in my coat."

"Flo Rida Did you know Right Round by Flo Rida was actually taken from an old Nazi spiritual from the '40's? Oh yeah, the original goes like this: Jew spin mein head reich round, reich round..."

"Cop: i told you this land is off limits Me: oh i thought you said it was all flimits Cop: wtf are flimits Me: idk let's go look Cop: ok"

"Made a shepherd's pie last night... He didn't like it."

"I lost my first cage fight last night .. not all dogs want cuddles."