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Joke of the Day

"God, designing a toddler: ya know what would be hilarious would be if it has no ability to reason but talks nonstop. Also make it trip a lot"

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"Lifes a bitch Grab it by the pussy"
"What do you call the musical Messiah? Gsus"
"What's the capital of Greece? About 10"
"A little boy told his mom that he wants to be like Donald trump when he grows up Mom: Well pick one, you cant be both"
"I just bought a bottle of Drano... Well that was $4 down the drain."
"I'm not racist! I have a colored TV."
"The World Trade Center had a Speed-Reading club they went thru fifty stories in thirty seconds"
"What did the physicist have for lunch? Fission chips."
"Ya man, it is weird that your wife started wearing the same cologne I wear."