190095

Joke of the Day

"Two blondes are sitting on a park bench Suddenly one sniffs the air and exclaims, ""I smell a cock!"" ""Sorry,"" says the other. ""I farted."""

"Britain should have written a break up note ""It's not EU, it's me"""

"According to my current parking spot I'm a physician"

"Q: How many Russian leaders does it take to change a light bulb? A: Nobody knows. Russian leaders don't last as long as light bulbs. A: None the old bulb is just suffering from a cold."

"- do u like green eggs & ham? - i do not like them, sam i am - but why? - animal agriculture leads to global warming sam read a goddamn book"

"If you have that loud keyboard clicking sound enabled on your iPhone, give me your phone. You don't get a phone."

"Someone told me that I looked familiar. So I asked them if they watched porn."

"I was told getting a tongue piercing would help me with oral sex... I still can't reach it..."

"My wife's so ungrateful The other day I gave her a massive orgasm, and she just spit it out."

"At least there's one other woman who's more wasted than me in this emergency room. No, my mistake, she's got dementia."