189972

Joke of the Day

"In America child protection saves your kids from your beating In Soviet Russia child protection beats your kids"

"You're like a magnet... Your fatass is always on the fridge."

"A speedo is just a man's way of saying ""not today girls""."

"My body is 99 degrees And the flu might add a few more (I fuckin suck at jokes)"

"Why was the skeleton alone at prom? Because he had no body to go with!"

"Wife: I want to see some snow. Me: You might get to see 3 to 4 inches tonight. Wife: I'd rather see snow."

"I like my women like I like my spaghetti sauce... Prego"

"The Most Dangerous Place on the Planet! Those BASTARDS!!! It's a [death trap](http://www.savagemill.com/wp-content/uploads/StoreFront_HandsOfTime.jpg)..."

"Ugh, I may have lost my ""World's Best Dad"" keychain. My 2 year old was playing with it an hour ago but I don't know where she went."

"I forgot my U-bend was blocked when I went to the toilet... I soon remembered, when it all came flooding back."