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Joke of the Day

"why did the chicken cross the road because it was stuck to the farmers knob."

"Newton taught us that a body at rest will remain at rest, a body in motion will remain in motion, and that figs taste good in cookies."

"When I see your face, there's not a thing I would change .... except the direction I'm walking in."

"CHEAP and EASY Hack for Getting in Touch With Your Inner Self: Use 1 ply toilet paper"

"Why aren't Japanese optimistic? Because not every cloud has a silver lining"

"Did you hear? Oxygen and Magnesium are dating. When I found out I was like OMg!"

"Oxycodone With my wisdom teeth gone, I was hoping of getting a bit of a high, but all it did was relieve pain. well that was a ""downer"""

"""That's Superman, that's Batman, and that's Cyborg. If you won't call them by their names, I can't play with you anymore."" - me to my 5yo."

"What did the cheese maker say to his son after he dropped the cheese? That's no whey to go through life, son."

"How do moms in west Virginia know their daughter started her period? Her son's dick tasted like blood."