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Joke of the Day

"My left buttcheek fell asleep. I'm Half-assing everything I do for the next ten minutes."

"What is the difference between a PhD in mathematics and a large pizza? The pizza can feed a family of four"

"Why did the pirate go to Ireland? he thought he was going to Arrrland."

"Ladies, if he says he would go to the ""end of the earth"" for you and then he goes missing, check Finland."

"Most medicines have side effects... ...except Viagra has front effects. Good bye."

"Call me ignorant, but I have no idea what you're talking about. - ""That's exactly what ignorant means."" I don't get it."

"What's the best drug to have sex on? Birth control."

"Everything I need to know about whether or not cops are allowed to search my car I learned from Jay-Z songs."

"A VIEW DO ASIAN PEOPLE VIEW THE WORLD IN LETTERBOX EDITION?"

"The past, present and future walked into a bar. It was tense... Then a wigwam and a tepee walked into the bar and I left quickly. Things had gotten too tense."