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Joke of the Day

"Work meeting Boss: it's come to my attention that someone has been eating out of the trash! Everyone, including his pet raccoon looks at me"

"I've gone from agony to ecstasy in this last week. Hopefully, by the end of this month... ...I'll be done reading this dictionary."

"Who is the funniest American politician? Hillarious Clinton"

"[taking communion at church] I'm a recovering alcoholic do you have any actual blood?"

"Comic Sans walks into a bar. Barman says ""sorry we don't serve your type in here"""

"Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm God When did this start? Well first I created the sun then the earth..."

"Comcast Cable acquiring Time Warner Cable is a lot like your proctologist acquiring a bigger finger."

"What did Alan Rickman say when he stood over David Bowie's grave? Do you mind if I Slytherin?"

"Q: Why is a room full of married people empty? A: There isn't a single person in it."

"Rohypnol......."