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Joke of the Day

"You know they've had sex change operations for men for a while now, right? Well they just recently started offering sex change operations for women, too. It's called the ""addadictomy""."

"Definition of Insomnia: Finding a spider in your bedroom & when you leave for a second to get the spray & come back it's gone"

"It appears the brain trust has commenced its meeting. Listen to those synapses fire."

"Whats the difference between to dicks and a joke? Your mom cant take a joke. (Heard this from somebody in my class today)"

"Why did Princess Diana cross the road? A: Conservation of momentum. _____ *Also, give me your best dark jokes, I've been out of it a few years and I need to get some new material.*"

"What do you call an Alabama woman who can run faster than her brother? virgin"

"If you're in your car, go ahead and pick your nose, because the car makes you invisible."

"Did you hear Wells Fargo has a baseball team? They are really good at stealing homes."

"I asked my Dad if we could get any pets... He said pets are just a step backwards."

"My kids saw a painting of Jesus & both thought it was Bob Marley. Clearly, I'm going to hell. My kids don't know what Bob Marley looks like"