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Joke of the Day

"The iPhone 7 ad has a catchy song... Hit the road Jack"

"What do you call an epic space opera set during the Russian Revolution? Tsar Wars"

"To everyone who received a file from me named myjunk.jpg: I thought I was sending you a photo of my garage sale. I am so, so sorry."

"""Arise! Arise! Foul creatures, I command that you arise! ARISE!"" ""Dad, just once, couldn't you let mom or the alarm clock wake us?"" ""ARISE!"""

"I hate playing chess with Australian players Every check is a check, mate."

"What do cheese and cancer have in common? Americans put it everywhere!"

"What type of lights were on Noah's Ark? You'd think it would be floodlights, but in reality it was the Israelites!"

"What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Get off me, homes!"

"I'll vote for whichever presidential candidate promises to end the banter before two people announce who won an Emmy."

"Santa keeps his suits in the clauset."