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Joke of the Day

"To everyone who received a file from me named myjunk.jpg: I thought I was sending you a photo of my garage sale. I am so, so sorry."

"Whoever said ""The best things in life are free"" obviously knew a very unsuccessful coke dealer."

"Roses are #FF0000, violets are #0000FF. All my base are belong to you."

"Assorted s a/e x jokes Remember to always practice safe sax We don't suck we blow wet the butt, wiggle, and blow"

"Whats the difference between your mom and a mosquito? (not for sensitive peeps) A mosquito stops sucking after you slap it"

"Why is a lobster similar to a Asian under a steamroller? They are both crushed-asians"

"What do rioting jewish people throw? Mazel tov cocktails"

"Pistorius won't have trouble finding his feet when they jail him, they will be kept in a box next to the door"

"What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? World War II."

"ME: I'VE BEEN SHOT TAYLOR SWIFT: Aw here are some band aids ME: THOSE DON'T FIX BULLETHOLES TS: *picks up guitar* ...brb ME: I'M STILL DYING"