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Joke of the Day

"I was the principle subject in a lengthy experiment on laziness They told me the results but I couldn't be fucked listening."

"I'm working on my second million, since I failed so much at the first."

"Did you hear about the two gay truckers? They exchanged loads"

"I told my wife she would look sexier with her hair back... She was pissed! Apparently that's a insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient."

"What do you call a group of Chlamydia bacteria? An applause...."

"Just got back from Chernobyl And boy are my legs arms!"

"What did the pirate say when he turned 80 years old? Aye matey!"

"Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering A minor."

"For the first time I am going to be visiting Britain this summer, but when I got there... Britain had already left."

"*Alcohol kills germs. *Vodka is alcohol. *Flu is germs. *Vodka kills the flu. *You're welcome!"