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Joke of the Day
"I guess my least favorite author is probably Hitler"
Next Joke
"In honor of his passing, my dad's favorite joke to tell waiters Waiter: ""And to drink, sir?"" Dad: ""I'll have a blind coke."" Waiter: ""I'm sorry?"" Dad: ""You know, a blind coke. No ice."""
"What's the difference between a motivational speaker and a baseball player? The baseball player has all of its limbs."
"Date me? You can't afford the maintenance to keep me. Vodka, high heels, steak, shiny clothes, tonic, Victoria's Secret, and bail money."
"What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with Cheese"
"You know how if a bear is about to attack you, you're supposed to stand totally still? Your smarter friend that's running just punkd you."
"Sleep is always the answer. Upset? Go to sleep. Not feeling well? Go to sleep. Already asleep? Stop making excuses and go to sleep harder."
"She:I'm furious with my son He's playing Doctor with Neighbor's daughter He:Its curiosity about sex She:Sex? He's taken her appendix out"
"Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning"
"Girls are like roads, the more curves, the more dangerous they are."