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Joke of the Day
"Why are men like blenders? You need one but you're not quite sure why."
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"Every time someone tells a bulimia joke... Every time someone tells a bulimia joke I throw up in disgust. Please keep them coming."
"""Tell me why I shouldn't report you to HR?"" The doctor yelled at me when I used the defibrillator wrong. ""I don't work here"" I yelled back."
"Redditor with a bomb EDIT: Wow, this really blew up! u/flyingscotzman u/FlyingScotzman user/flyingscotzman user/FlyingScotzman"
"If someone ever intimidates you, remember that they're 70% water. Are you scared of water? Well you should be. 400,000 people drown per year"
"I want this guy to teach me to fish, but he keeps handing me lemons."
"Meeting new people and trying my best to act all sunglasses emoji."
"Why is your mom like a 360 noscope? Cuz I wouldn't hit that."
"""Did you hear? Lament's gettin' a Ph.D."" ""What does Ph.D. stand for?"" ""in his case Pin-headed Dope."""
"Whats the closest a Mexican will ever be to happiness? The border."