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Joke of the Day

"We got a tornado warning, and I'm too scared to open my windows. Don't want any sharks in my house."

"Why did the angel lose her job? She had harp failure."

"What's the difference between a man and a margarita? A margarita hits the spot every time."

"If you're in Los Angeles and lost your wallet near the Starbucks on Melrose I found your wallet but not the $58 inside it."

"Whats a Feminist's favorite math subject? Triggerednometry"

"Why did Adele cross the road? So she could say hello from the other side (If this has already been posted I might cry I thought I made this all up on my own haha)"

"How did the redneck find the sheep in the tall grass? Satisfying."

"I'd read a book written by the person who pushes the room service cart into people's hotel rooms."

"Autocorrect makes me say things that... I didn't Nintendo."

"Why did the man name his daughter Candy? She was the sweetest mistake he ever made."