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Joke of the Day

"They say a woman deserves a man that looks at her every day like it's the first time he's seen her. It's wrong to promote Alzheimer's."

"What do you call an Asian who acts like he is black? A ripe bananna"

"*writing classic song* Damn, I have the ""For he's a jolly good fellow"" part repeating three times but how am I gonna wrap this bad boy up?"

"Why do french tanks have rear view mirrors? To see the battle."

"You have to be careful when telling rape jokes... You never know who got buthurt"

"I THINK I DRANK TOO MUCH SWEET TEA AND I'M SO AWAKE AND NO ONE ELSE SEEMS TO BE AWAKE AND YOU KNOW WHAT I HAVEN'T DONE IN A WHILE, LUNGES!!"

"They told me if you put your newborn in front of an orphanage he would grow up an Orphan So I stuck my baby in the ATM machine so he could grow up to be a rich banker"

"I've got a Turkish friend. She's not hot or cold. Shawarma."

"Whenever I see an elderly person who looks lost and confused, I stop and take a moment to feed 'em a peanut."

"I'm crap at telling jokes. I keep on punching up the fuck lines."