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Joke of the Day

"What do male lawyers call a female barrister? A barista. Because she's only useful for getting coffee."

"What's the difference between cab drivers and F1 drivers? F1 driver doesn't think he's a cab driver"

"The best person to get thrown in jail with would have to be the Kool-Aid Man."

"Way back when, I thought technology would look more like flying cars and less like me yelling ""The laptop's not a touch screen,"" at my kids."

"Did you guys hear about the man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray? He turned out to be a seasoned veteran."

"Where do you put a badly behaved spaceman? On the astronaughty step."

"Criminal Tip: Buy a gun from a guy off the streets. As soon as he sells it to you, point it at him & get your $$ back. Free gun."

"If I was the editor of Vogue, I'd just put an actual skeleton on the cover with the headline, ""Feel bad yet? You should, Fatty."""

"What do you get if you mix up together an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac? A guy who is up all night wondering if there is a dog."

"What was John Lennons final hit? The pavement"