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Joke of the Day

"Bath time without my phone: 10 minutes Bath time with my phone: 45 minutes 75 retweets 1 wrinkly baby"

"What an age we live in... ... when a family of billionaires moves into government subsidized housing previously occupied by black people."

"What is the difference between a sharply dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle? A tire"

"Anyone here know of Gaddafi? Probably not. He's pretty underground."

"Which rapist was a famous mathematician? Bill cos(b)"

"What should you do if you are on a picnic with King Kong? Give him the biggest bananas."

"If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?"

"What's white and red, 3 inches long, and makes dudes scream and run away when you show it to them? A positive pregnancy test."

"Guy gets wife roses. She says ""I guess this means you want me on my back w my legs in the air?"" He says, ""Why, we don't have a Vase?"

"An Anus Gets into a fight with two guys at a bar He rectum"