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Joke of the Day
"How does Bilbo take his tea? Bag-in"
Next Joke
"""Daddy, why do dogs need whiskers?"" -my 7-year-old son, while discreetly holding scissors in one hand and dog whiskers in the other"
"if you are getting the names Jon and John confused call them by their full names, Jonaldo and Johnaldo"
"What's the difference between a fox and a pig? About six drinks"
"What do you call a Chinese man with a bad sense of direction? Wong Wei"
"Tampons What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing they're both stuck up cunts."
"""Give it to me"", she screamed ""I'm so fucking wet, give it to me now"" ""Fuck off"", I said ""this is my umbrella"""
"I used to work in a fire hydrant factory... but you couldn't park anywhere near the place. [credit to Stephen Wright]"
"Hallmark Card: ""I'm so miserable without you, it's almost like you're still here."""
"What kind of sharks make good carpenters? Hammerheads!"