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Joke of the Day
"My astronomy professor told me I was his star pupil."
Next Joke
"Whats the difference between Facebook and Reddit? About two hours."
"As a farmer I've heard lots of jokes about sheep. I told them to my dog but he'd heard them all."
"Don't you hate it when you're peeing and someone starts talking to you? It's like, keep your mouth open or it all goes to waste."
"""Lifehack"" is now just synonymous with ""action."" ""A great lifehack for becoming a doctor is going to medical school!"""
"Telling someone they can't be sad because others have it worse is like telling someone they can't be happy because others have it better."
"First day at gym and i've already lost 5kg. seriously, i have no idea where i misplaced those weights.."
"""People want to feel special.. they'll buy sugary piss in a bottle as long as it has their name on it."" - Executives at Coke"
"[lookin in bushes for our baby] me: where the hell can he be? dog: roof roof roof me: will you shut up [baby waves at the dog from the roof]"
"Did you hear about the kleptomaniac with no sense of humor? He took everything literally"