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Joke of the Day

"Babies are like Starbucks because they're expensive as shit and yet you still forget them on the roof of your car"

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"What's the fourth derivative called? Inauguration. Why? Change of jerk."
"Why is poo tapered? So your arse doesn't slam."
"What do you call... What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts. What do you call nuts on your wall? Walnuts. What do you call nuts on your chin? A DICK in your mouth!"
"I tried to offer my school administrator a bribe But he was too principled"
"I need a draft folder for my mouth."
"I got a new one for you. You know how I can tell if the government smokes the pot the DEA seizes? THEY'RE paranoid and OUR rights are being taken away."
"Who is the drummer for the Mexican Beatles? Gringo Starr"
"Why are there separate book donation boxes for Nigeria, Ghana, AND Zambia outside the bookstore? Am I supposed to pick my favorite?"
"Vanna White's birthday is today... Pretty soon she'll be getting to the age where she has trouble with her vowel movements."
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