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Joke of the Day

"A local movie theatre was robbed of $600 worth of merchandise The suspects stole 3 medium popcorns, 1 bag of skittles and 4 small diet cokes."

"GOD: Done! Every animal niche perfectly filled WOODPECKERS: We didn't get anything GOD: Oh. Uh...just pound trees with your face"

"Single guy ""I can't do anything right."" Married guy ""I can't do anything, right?"""

"Two biologists have twins. They named one Jessica, and named the other Control."

"What is a ghost pirate's favourite letter? Boo! T"

"Scientists have created a mutant version of the deadly 1918 Spanish flu virus in an effort to better understand how pandemics start. I'm not a scientist, but this is how pandemics start."

"Women just want to make us better men, not drain our life essence. And sharks are just trying to kiss us but their teeth get in the way."

"What's the capital of Greece? About 15 cents."

"What do you call two crows together? Attempted murder."

"I found a spider in my shoes. He looks ridiculous, they're way too big for him."