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Joke of the Day
"Relationship status: Just kissed my cat and he got up and moved to the other end of the couch."
Next Joke
"Everybody always says they want a fairytale wedding, but when I show up and curse their newborn, suddenly I'm a jerk."
"Some people say ""If you can't beat them, join them"". I say ""If you can't beat them, beat them"", because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise."
"What does Kim Jong-un have in common with gingers? No Seoul."
"""john, did you see my dog?"" ""Yes, i did. He was in the garden... ""He was in the garden doing politics, so i shot him"". ""How can you tell he was doing politics?"" ""He was eating shit, Sir !"""
"I'm so poor... I just rinsed off a paper plate."
"""Titanic."" ""What??""   ""Sorry, that wasn't a very good icebreaker."""
"""It's clear"" said the teacher ""That you haven't studied your geography. What's your excuse?"" ""Well my dad says the world is changing every day . So I decided to wait until it settles down!"""
"2 guys walk into a bar... The one who ducked was never a Pokemon fan."
"What tastes good on pie, but not on pussy? Crust."