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Joke of the Day

"I was feeling great about myself when I saw my number on the womens bathroom wall 'for a good time'. Then I recognized my hand writing."

"Way back when, I thought technology would look more like flying cars and less like me yelling ""The laptop's not a touch screen,"" at my kids."

"*Holds an old lady's hand as I help her across the street* don't worry ma'am i'm sure the doctors can sew it back on"

"A Native American just published a novel Critics consider it a Seminole work."

"My life has been going round in circles recently. I'm starting to think that my wheelchair is faulty."

"My computer crashed. Now all the other computers have slowed down so they can see what's happening."

"Why do Scuba divers fall backwards into the water? Because if they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat"

"What is hot and makes me hard? Being covered in lava."

"All I'm saying is there's no coincidence that Superheroes come in all forms and so does cheese."

"How come Smokey the Bear doesn't have any children? Every time his wife gets hot he beats her with a shovel."