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Joke of the Day

"WANTED: Good man, about 90 years old, half blind, deaf in one ear, bad leg, no teeth, good with a gun.. To watch my wife while I'm out hunting."

"I don't think people realize how terrible Blackbeard was... The correct term is African Americanbeard"

"HER: You almost ready to go to my mothers? ME: *looking out window wondering if the jump will only break a leg & not kill me* Be right down."

"Why did the cop climb the tree? He worked for a special branch."

"People who say ""adorbs"" make me miserbs"

"What do you call a womans vagina after having a baby... ""Baby Gap"""

"My ex asked me why I never payed attention to her I told her to repeat that again, the TV was distracting me."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb and one to suck my dick."

"What do you call a sleepy Tumblr user? Napkin."

"What did Alex Trebek say when he was about to lose his job? ""My career is in Jeopardy!"""