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Joke of the Day

"How do Mexicans cut their pizza? with Little Ceasars"

"Hold.. Hold.. Hold.. CHARGE!!!!! -Ice at the bottom of a glass"

"A Czech goes for an eye check up The optician shows the letters on the board: CZWXNQSTAZKY Doctor: Can you read this? Czech: Read? I even know the guy, he's my cousin."

"What did the cave woman use as a dildo? A fucking rock"

"Women's Magazines: Pg 1. You're beautiful and perfect just the way you are Pg 2. How to lose 20kg in 10 days."

"Why did the console cross the road? To render the buildings on the other side."

"I used to have a student who suffered from suicidal thoughts but now I don't."

"Q: How many Labour Party members does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: None. They haven't got a policy on that."

"Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver. Pee is yellow. Shit is brown. I am drunk. This is a tweet."

"I'm 87 but have the body of a 25-year-old supermodel But it takes up too much room in my freezer, any suggestions?"