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Joke of the Day

"Why is the algorithms lecturer so fat? Because he always minimises the running time."

"Would you like to hear a german joke? Tut mir leid so ein Ding existiert nicht Edit 1: Grammar"

"What is the difference between USA and USB? One connects to all of your devices and accesses the data, the other is a hardware standard."

"So a man asks a rabbi... ""Do you make a lot of money doing circumcisions?"" To which the Rabbi replies: ""Not really, but I get to keep the tips."""

"Your mother has the prettiest teeth I ever came across."

"When a killer makes you dig your own grave, throw the soil far away so he has trouble backfilling."

"Monica Lewinsky turns 39!! They grow up so fast...seems like yesterday she was crawling around the White House on her hands and knees puting everything in her mouth!!!"

"Why don't you hire a violinist as your babysitter? Because he might fiddle with your kids."

"Hostage jokes aren't funny... Unless you execute them well."

"How does a Syrian family have a meal? The men provide the food and the women do the cooking, leaving the children to wash up afterwards."