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Joke of the Day

"Told my black co-worker that I'm avoiding Africans at the airport this weekend. His response: ""I'm avoiding them everywhere!"""

"I decided to see what it was like to live as a woman. So I sewed all the pockets of my jeans shut. EDIT: Corrected spelling."

"You - ""Have you seen the clown that hides from gay people?"" Friend - ""No?"" You - ""Didn't think so"""

"Q: Why did the Apatosaurus devour the factory? A: Because she was a plant eater!"

"What do you get if you cross the Queen and Prince Philip? Murdered in a tunnel in Paris."

"A horse walks into a bar... And the barman says ""Why the long face?"""

"How do you put out a maxipad fire? You tampon it."

"What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? I've yet to pay money to have a lentil on my face"

"Children Fever Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one."

"What did the hummingbird do to his girlfriend? He nectar!"