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Joke of the Day

"How many chicken does it take to screw in a light bulb? Still counting. Those darned birds can't seem to cross the road to get over here to screw in the light bulb."

"2016 is like... A 30 second ad on YouTube that you can't skip"

"Do you know what they feed you at Guantanamo Bay? Well after being there for 30 years, neither do I!"

"The cat licks itself and it's cute. I do it and I'm ""no longer allowed in the library""."

"Volkswagen announces it will open a facility in Israel to make a new advanced vehicle... The new models are are so advanced not only will they stop on a dime, they'll actually pick it up."

"It doesn't matter whether you're a bad parent or a bad drug dealer... Because at the end of the day a kid gets smacked."

"What do a near sighted gynecologist and a puppy have in common? A wet nose."

"Sean Connery and fat girl with a lisp meet in a bar"

"Did you know that Boy George's pet reptile bit 7 people today?! I think he needs a calmer chameleon"

"Where do Muslims go after their Friday prayer? To the Allahu Akbar"