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Joke of the Day

"2016 is like... A 30 second ad on YouTube that you can't skip"

"What do women and Spotify ads have in common? They're both annoying and want your money."

"Me: I don't scare easily. Pregnant wife: All four of our daughters will be teenagers at the same time. Me: *never stops screaming*"

"Big GTA 5 bug A cop killed my white character in GTA 5. Anyone else experiencing this bug?"

"What's the difference between a tuna, a piano, and a tub of glue? You can tuna piano, but you can't piano tuna."

"How did the possessed lady lose weight? Diet and exorcise."

"I'm selling books on how to avoid saying the wrong thing and getting into fights. Who wants some?"

"I tried being polite by holding the door open for a lady She kept yelling, ""I'm peeing in here!"" What a bitch."

"My friends say there is a gay guy in our circle of friends... I really hope it's Todd, he's cute"

"Why don't you sleep with an 90 year old lady..... Have you ever tried to peel a grilled cheese apart?!?"