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Joke of the Day
"I wish I was half excited about anything as a four year old is to push an elevator button."
Next Joke
"How do you know when you have a high sperm count? Your partner has to chew before swallowing..."
"Just been reading Delia Smith's recipe for scrambled eggs... Apparently ""they should be soft and fluffy."" No you daft bitch that means they've hatched."
"How is Rihanna's boyfriend and power tools the same? They're both Black and Decker."
"""It's not about the size of the boat it's the motion of the ocean""... But it's hard to get cross the Atlantic with a rowboat"
"Jamie Oliver says there's ""nothin worse in the world than an undercooked green bean"" I'll go out on a limb & say he doesn't watch the news."
"What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't gonna come."
"Why is Jewish apple cake Jewish? Because it's baked in an oven..."
"When Tim Tebow found out he got cut by the Eagles he threw a fit... .. And even that got intercepted."
"My favorite tree died earlier. Now I have mourning wood."