179207

Joke of the Day

"The number of Pina coladas I drank on vacation is this (my daughter doesn't want to cruise with me again) many."

"Whats black and white and red all over? A race war."

"Sea World announced they're not going to breed Orcas in captivity anymore... So now the only whales you'll see in a theme park are the American women"

"Why were the inventors of the airplane correct in thinking they could fly? Because they were Wright."

"Why do women fake orgasms? Because men fake foreplay."

"one time this girl pulled me close & said ""I'm the girl your mom warned you about"" & I said ""so you chose bulbasaur as your starter pokemon"""

"Whats pink and smells awful? Your mums cunt lol"

"What do you call the state of having confidence? I'm sorry, it's confidential."

"I know I'll be a good father. I've had my iPhone for over 6 months now and I've only dropped it 182 times so far."

"It's a well know fact that Elton John is an excellent pianist. But did you know he sucks on the organ?"