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Joke of the Day
"You better take care of me Lord, if you don't you're gonna have me on your hands."
Next Joke
"What do you do when your wife is blocking view of the TV? Go to the kitchen and shorten her chain."
"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Do you know why I stopped? *silence* *a saxophone wails in the distance*"
"No, not bisexual, I said beesexual. I fuck bees."
"Beer: When are you coming home. Me: Right away honey. See. Marriage works. Just choose the right wife."
"Why did the bacteria cross the microscope? To get to the other slide"
"Not sure why, but even when I shower alone, I still get a little nervous when I drop the soap."
"I'm in a Josef Fritzl tribute band... You probably haven't heard of us, we're pretty underground."
"After sex, a lot of people like to smoke a cigarette. As a gay man, me and my boyfriend smoke weed after sex. After all, in the bible it says ""if a man lies with another man, he should be stoned."""
"Scented toilet paper girlfriend: is this toilet paper scented? Me: I'm not sure; my asshole doesn't smell so good"