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Joke of the Day
"Knock knock"
Next Joke
"Whenever i get job applications, the first thing i do is throw half of them in the trash. I don't want to hire any unlucky people"
"Patient: Doctor! Doctor! My mouth tastes like the bottom of a birdcage! Dentist: Yes, I can see there's been a cockatoo in there."
"Opening a new restaurant, focusing on gourmet noodles and spaghetti. We're also going to offer free delivery. We're calling it Send Noods"
"LOL there's like 20 guys w/ ""Female Body Inspector"" windbreakers that's hilarious they're seizing my hard drive & business records LMAO"
"I just saw that Harry Potter film. I think its a bit unrealistic if you ask me.. I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends? How?"
"I don't mean to brag but I've perfected the confused look whenever my credit cards get declined"
"Me: I wonder what the wicked witch's name is. 7: Ding Dong. Me: What? 7: The song says, Ding Dong the Witch is dead. Me: Oh. My. God. "
"What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again."
"What did the kleptomaniacal compulsive liar say when his beekeeper friend asked him what he was running away with? ""None of your beeswax!"""