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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Skeleton cross the road? Question: Why did the Skeleton cross the road? Answer: To go to the body shop."

"Removed all the mirrors from my house because I'm tired of living with that asshole."

"For Halloween I'm dressing up as a plate. Girls love to do dishes."

"I married a kleptomaniac... She stole my heart."

"Definition of circlejerk circlejerk: What comes around goes around."

"""I'm a huge fan."" - Peacocks"

"Like all great artists, Drake will reach a tipping point in his career And follow Snoop Lion's footsteps and reincarnate himself as Dragon."

"When toasting the holidays Republicans ask for eggnog or mulled wine. Democrats ask for a ""Bud."""

"I like my women just like my beer. Bound together with plastic."

"What's the difference between Cottage Cheese and Cream Cheese? I didn't cottage in my pants"