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Joke of the Day

"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? Zero."

"relationships are like farts too much force will result in shit"

"GF: I'm sick of you pretending you're a detective. We should split up ME: Good idea. We can cover more ground that way."

"The other day I was wondering, why does a frisbee appear larger the closer it gets? And then it hit me."

"If you put your ear up to a vagina... you can smell the ocean."

"If the Austrian Police had a Orchestra, what instrument would they use? The Glockenspiel."

"its funny when people are like ""whos to say whats truly 'cool'... who gets to define cool"". its like, come on dude. hot babes decide it. duh"

"Waiter waiter does the pianist play requests? Yes sir. Then ask him to play tiddlywinks until I've finished my meal."

"Your Gay? I thought about being gay. But eons and eons of time made me into a tit loving. Vagina eating monster i just cant stop."

"Dear God, when I said six zeros salary, I didn't mean only zeros."