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Joke of the Day

"What did the survivor of cranial sodomy say to the police after the incident? ""At night when I close my eyes I can still hear them coming..."""

Next Joke
 
"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? NONE!"
"A lier, crook, and murderer walks into a bar.... The bartender asks, ""What'll it be, Mrs. Clinton?"""
"A manual RT is like saying ""Hey check out this guy, but keep looking at my face. Please...don't ever stop looking at my face..."""
"I'm smiling. This should scare you."
"About 90% of people do not know the opposite of these words... Always Coming From Take Me Down"
"If I ever have to feed kids, I just shove shit in a blender give them a straw & tell them that's what astronauts eat."
"You have to sit up to drink coffee in bed. I know that now."
"What did the traffic light say to the car? Don't look, i'm changing."
"What's the difference Donald Trump and my Vagina? One's a Cunt and the other has nice hair."