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Joke of the Day

"After twin sisters plummeted off a Hawaii cliff, one died. The other was charged with murder. Just goes to show if you can't take the sting out of a bee, take the bee from the ... sting."

"""Why aren't you wearing a coat?""""Coats are for pussies.""My mother asks too many questions."

"Driving back from funeral yesterday: Stairway To Heaven *click* Tears In Heaven *click* Highway To Hell *click* Macarena! *leaves it*"

"I hope death is a woman. That way, it will never come for me."

"Why are orphans terrible at baseball? They've never known what home is."

"Summer was especially good this year in Canada... If I recall correctly it was a friday"

"What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels? Jack Daniels is still killing Indians"

"dont judge a book by its cover. dont judge a book at all. read a book. write a book. dont judge a book unless that book has murdered someone"

"I was stuck in traffic while on the road in Ireland... Cork was in a bottleneck."

"Did you hear the Miami Heat's new theme song? It's absolute fire"