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Joke of the Day

"me: What? A lot of people launch shopping carts across parking lots wife: Yeah but they take the kid out first! son *screaming*"

"Atheism is non-prophet organization."

"What do you call a sudden fart? An institute."

"Now that Jeremy Lin is playing so well for the Knicks.. It appears that the NBA is now a Black/Thai affair."

"Since I live my financial life under water I decided to put a ""Beware of sharks"" sign in my front yard."

"What is Germany's favorite game? Mein Kampf"

"Do it for the vine https://vine.co/v/eu9MOKJaiYi"

"What do New York McDonald's employees and people who read Ulysses have in common? Liberal Arts Degrees."

"I said ""no"" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen."

"A horror movie, but the monster chasing me is my coworker that wants to tell me about her date last night. *twists ankle by the copier"