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Joke of the Day
"Man who eat jeellybeans.... Farts in technicolor."
Next Joke
"It's amazing with all of the bars in Boston that AT&T; only has one."
"The good thing about lending someone your time machine is that you basically get it back immediately."
"I am never going to procrastinate again... Starting next semester"
"What's the difference between heroin and the cast of the jersey shore? I wouldn't shoot heroin."
"two muffins were in an oven. one muffin turns to the other muffin and says ""its hot in here "" the second muffin turns to the first muffin and says "" holy shit a talking muffin"""
"Is your birthday the 10th of October? Because you look like a 10/10!"
"If I ever go to prison, I know exactly what I'm going to nickname myself... Mitochondria! That way everyone will know I'm the powerhouse of the cell."
"I have a friend called Rick that was recently turned into cotton... we have to call him Threadrick now. I thought of this joke on the way to buy my lunch today, I hope it's not already been made."
"""...This one is TOO big. This one is JUST right."" -my daughter, picking out her preferred public toilet."