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Joke of the Day

"Only 2 kids made it out of my Jedi class. One killed the padawans. The other was abandoned in the desert I'm dreading that class reunion."

"Is it appropriate for a receptionist at a sperm clinic to tell their clients ""thanks for coming"" as they leave?"

"every morning i swallow a piece of paper that says ""keep up the good work fellas!!"" just in case i die and doctors gotta do an autopsy on me"

"This subreddit has terrible puns on pretty much every subject. In particular, it has puns about the Scottish."

"My ex was just diagnosed as a narcissist Good to see I'm not the only one with low standards."

"Why can't a lesbian diet and wear make up at the same time? Because..........It is hard to eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on her face."

"What do you give a cannibal late for Sunday lunch? The cold shoulder"

"How did Sherlock reply to Watson's inquiry, ""Sherlock, where did you get all of these lemons?"" ""A lemon tree, my dear Watson."""

"What do gangsters put on their nachos? Glock-amole"

"What do a tornado and a redneck wedding have in common? Either way you lose a motorhome."