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Joke of the Day

"Q: What's another name for the ""Intel Inside"" sticker they put on Pentiums? A: The warning label."

"Mr. Buffalo: I caught my son making out with a girl Me: SWEET! Mr. Buffalo: And a boy Me: So, I guess you could say he's your... Bi-son"

"I yell ""5 second rule""when ever a girl sits on the ground."

"What do they teach in ISIS business school? Execution is everything."

"What do the English and Welsh have in common? Kids are their definition of a good time."

"Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?"

"The developmental psychologists got back to us about our son. They said he's smart on paper... Unfortunately he can't read"

"What do you do with a sick boat? Take it to the dock."

"Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are in a plane crash. Who survives? America."

"Apparently, lifting your feet so she can reach underneath, Is NOT considered ""helping her vacuum."" Lesson learned, fellas. Lesson learned."