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Joke of the Day
"sorry I haven't been tweeting much lately. I've been reading the Cheesecake Factory menu"
Next Joke
"Pregnant - Beyonce Pregnant with twins - Beytwice"
"What do you call a gay geologist? Fagate."
"My grandfather always said, ""Be envied, not envious."" I wish I'd thought of that quote."
"Why couldn't Frodo drop the Ring into Mt. Doom? Force of Hobbit."
"Q: Why did the haunted house not like rain? A: Because it dampened his spirits."
"If Jesus came back today, hipsters would be like ""whatever Jesus, the book was better."""
"Another Calculus Joke (Pun) Don't drink and derive!"
"They should bring lacrosse to the X Games... It would be a great opportunity to advertise ex-lax"
"I'll rephrase the question, your honor. Sir, under whose custody did the dogs escape from?? And let me remind you that you're under oath"