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Joke of the Day
"Guess who's watching Vin Diesel movies all day again? That's right: Vin Diesel."
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"""I only cheated on you with girls"" is the most beautiful thing a woman has ever said to me."
"How do fish get high? Seaweed"
"""I know, right?!!"" Is the WRONG thing to say when my neighbor tells me that his wife is wild in bed. Lesson learned."
"What did the sunbathing mother say to Michael Jackson as he walked by on the beach? Would you please move? You're in my sun."
"Q. Have you heard the latest scandal? A. Dr. Pepper was drunk at a party."
"Scientists are attempting to clone Ice Age Cave Lions because running into a raccoon when I take out the trash isn't scary enough."
"What do you call a boxing on a slackline? Punchline."
"A guy walks into a bar -- and sustains a mild concussion."
"'Jesus loves you' means one thing in general society. And something completely different in prison."