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Joke of the Day

"Why couldn't Batman go to the movie? Because it was rated ""PG"""

"Sanders supporters are like... that kid in class that gets Fs and Ds the whole semester and then says ""If I get a 100 on the final I can still get a C"""

"Crocodile breaks into Florida store, steals sports drinks. It was a Gator-raid."

"It turns out vaccines cause cancer. You'll actually live long enough to get it."

"Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Because North Korea's nukes couldn't reach him there"

"I bet Usher shows everyone to their seats at his concerts."

"[courtroom] Lawyer: If you didnt bite that surfers leg THEN WHO DID Shark: I'm telling you idk *whale in the audience opens a big newspaper*"

"I'm convinced some of you are here because someone didn't properly lock your cage."

"I was so excited. Thought I found an M&M at the bottom of my purse. It was only an earbud. I ate it anyway."

"I heard about a dog that was half bulldog and half shihtzu. Bullshit."